Confessions of a Design Burglar (part 1)

When it comes to design, distinguishing black from white is child’s play: Stealing is bad, and revolutionary new ideas are good.  Unfortunately, life’s rarely that simple.  Most “new” designs, whether plucked from the collective subconscious or inspired by a New York Times article, are derived from the work of others in one way or another – gray zone territory.  Since little in life is black or white, “playing the gray” is rather important to compete successfully.  The decisions you make – and the arguments you employ to justify them – will determine not only how you make out but how also well you sleep at night and whether or not you’ll face incarceration.  This post is my justification, my thesis and my confession – the confession of a design burglar.

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Sometimes the best way to express your creativity is to copy another person’s expression of their creativity.  By copying I mean stealing, albeit in the best possible way (and never to sell).  Of course, ideally all our ideas and projects would be completely original, but I suspect that would get rather tiresome – not to mention confusing.  Imagine how vexing it would be to live in a world where every washroom was completely distinct, where recognizing the difference between the toilet and the sink required reading an artist’s statement.*  So last October when I spied a rather elegant looking vintage anatomy print in Tony Cenicola’s New York Times photo essay Farmhouse Palette, I decided to knock it off and hatched a plot right then and there.  Sure, mistakes were made.  And I’ll admit things got messy.  But would I do it again?  You betcha.

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The photo that sparked a new Design Rules. From Tony Cenicola's New York Times photo essay Farmhouse Palette.

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It didn’t take long to find a similar anatomy book on Ebay.  After receiving my purchase, I bought a reasonably priced horizontal frame kit at Target. While the Plexi-glass leaves much to be desired, many hardware stores will cut glass to your specs, so it’s a problem that’s easily fixed.**  Next I visited Staples and color copied each head, leaving the original undamaged bad boys (why ruin the originals when I can sell the originals?), which I cut out and pasted onto a very substantial piece of black poster board.   It was all very Kindergarten (minus the over cloth).  While I don’t recommend such a cheap and tawdry concept for long-term displays, the technique works particularly well for trend-y images that you believe you’ll find tiresome in the not-too-distant future.

Surely this confession may come as a shock, and I’d throw myself on the mercy of the court if I were sorry, but frankly, I like the way it turned out.*** It goes without saying that it’s better to buy or create something completely innovative (good luck with that by the way), but if you have the desire and skill to knock off something for your own personal use, I’m OK with that.  What do you think?  Have you reached a verdict?

And with that, I bid you Happy Holidays.  You’re all the bee’s knees.

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*When viewed in that context, the bidet seems quite ordinary, but everybody in my posse reacts to the French invention with a shock ordinarily reserved for key parties, a concept I somewhat naively first learned about in the director Ang Lee’s 1997 cinematic adaption of writer Rick Moody’s novel The Ice Storm, which boasted an all-star cast, including my the very talented Kevin Cline and Sigorney Weaver, who hasn’t aged a day and has a very beautiful voice for narration.  But back to key parties, depending on the neighborhood (so to speak), they can be either deliciously disgusting (ala Jon and Kate) or pretty disgusting, so if you’re a budding entrepreneur, think facilitation.  If I’m right, I predict when the resurgent key party movement reaches a certain cultural apex in late 14 or early 15, NBC, still smarting from the failed Leno experiment, will hit ratings gold when it launches the hybrid game show / reality drama Key Klinks the Bowl, which will hopefully lead to Celebrity Key Klinks the Bowl, the thought of which makes me very happy.

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** I guess by the time I’m done I’ll have managed to put together a really poorly constructed, low-quality frame that took weeks to assemble and cost about the same as having it professionally framed.

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*** Shirley Frankly is the name of the detective I’m now writing a book about.  Not really, but I might.  Do you like the name Shirly Frankly?  For a guy?